Lousy Food Banished

Every second weekend, I get what some might call a dream roster — four days off in a row. You’d think I’d be unstoppable with all that time. Productive. Social. Out in the world doing things. Yeah, no.

I had plans. Big ones. The Webex Players Series at Willunga Golf Club — literally on every day this weekend. Free entry. Sunshine. Golf. Still didn’t go. Not once. Not even a casual drive-by to look sporty.

Then Sunday was meant to be the Hahn 3×3 basketball at the Adelaide Oval courts. Didn’t happen. Not even close.

And just to round out my record of commitment — I had a ticket to Harvest Rock Festival. Sold it last minute. What is wrong with me? Every time I tell people my plans, I somehow end up doing the opposite. It’s like my brain hears “social event” and replies, “yeah, but have you considered… staying home?”

The only thing I actually followed through with was baking. Because of course. While cleaning out the freezer (which should count as strength training), I found some frozen bananas — and what better use than banana bread? I always add extra banana, less vanilla. The banana’s the star; the rest is just backup vocals.

Also discovered a silverside buried at the bottom. Into the Thermomix it went. Came out perfect — served with roasted sweet potato, kohlrabi, honey-glazed carrots, and my secret mustard sauce (secret mostly because I don’t measure, I just vibe).

Then, for reasons unknown to even myself, I made a New York cheesecake. Five blocks of cream cheese. Seven eggs. Do you know how much that costs these days? I’m trying to save money, not open a bakery on Rundle St.

To make it all harder, I was in the middle of a fast. Do you know the mental strength it takes to bake and not taste? I’m basically a monk with a spatula.

Still, I did tick off one other adult thing — sorted out my house insurance. Not a win for the wallet, but still a win. Although, when the lady asked if I’d ever been arrested for fraud, my deadpan humour slipped out. I said, “Not yet — haven’t been caught.” Honestly surprised I haven’t had a knock on the door from the feds yet.

So no golf, no basketball, no music festival. But I’ve got a clean freezer, a full fridge, and a cheesecake worth its weight in gold. Maybe that’s what second-weekend freedom really looks like — just a little quieter, a little funnier, and slightly more carbohydrate-based than planned.

Questions for the table:

Do you ever make big weekend plans, tell everyone about them, and then bail completely — or is that just me perfecting the art of recreational flakiness?